The question is what do i want. What do i need... I think i've tried every type of escapism this week. I want to be held in someone's arms, i want to feel loved, i want to stop trying to run away from reality and start enjoying it. I want to live life. I'm sick of the talk of alcohol and sex, sure they are fantastic but shouldn't they compliment other elements in life and in relationships, not just be a sensation? I dont know. its incredibly frustrating because its so easy for me to succumb to alcohol and i am just over this whole thing.

I,ve always been a bit of everything, never one group or personality. i am so tired. Emotionally, physically etc. But i can't seem to be getting any sleep... I want to go to a beach, walk along at midnight, watch the stars... Dream.


symo said...

It's funny you should say that, cos I've felt pretty similar these past two weeks...
Like I'm running from something (reality perhaps), then running from God.
It's like you're at the end of a corridor, with a wall in front, and one on either side, but a door behind you at the other end of the corridor. Yet all you do is run at the walls - hopelessly crashing again and again into nothingness. At least that was how I felt.