Ok, quite a few personal revelations have happened in the last 24 hours. So I thought I'd elaborate about them here. First of all: I don't nearly have a boyfriend now. I realised I was trying to convince myself to like him, and it was so physically orientated and I think it was more for the attention. There is no 'spark'- it was more convenience. And I now find myself in the position where I've realised this, talked to him about it (that's right, I was honest and communicative!!)and its all good now. I didn't beat around the bush. I guess there is some people you connect with on different levels, and although I connect with him, its not as high as other people. In some ways i wish it was.

Another revelation: I need to write more.. Get emersed. I went to my first poetry forum today for the Sydney's Writers festival, and it was amazing meeting poets and being encouraged/tips on being published. My identity really resides in this and I need to stop living in a false lala land. I need to return to the things that really get me going and keep me passionate- rather than just skirting through life .... drinking gin and tonics getting drunk at the computer. I want to be 'drunk' on sonnets, words, life, nature, not just 'drunk' from drinking on nothing. So far I've got 24 typed poems! I'd love for constructive criticism, advice, anything so I am going to send them to a heap of stuff at the end of this week. Weeeee.

Third revelation: Try and trust in fate. But not blindly. Encourage fate, but let the universe work its magic... and try to follow it.

And now I must go and read some poetry, write a modern history essay, and write some poetry.. :D